When “Getting It Right” Holds Us Back
And why competence can be the enemy of brilliance
I was watching Rob & Romesh vs Bollywood recently, and an unexpected moment stopped me in my tracks.
During an acting lesson, the renowned actor Anupam Kher said something deceptively simple:
“Competence is the enemy of brilliance.”
At first, it sounds almost backwards. Surely competence is what we’re aiming for? To be capable. Skilled. Confident. To know what we’re doing.
But the more I sat with it, the more I realised how often I see this play out, especially in the world of hypnotherapy, learning, and personal growth.
The fear of getting it wrong in hypnotherapy training
When “getting it right” becomes the goal
So many people hold themselves back because they’re afraid of doing it wrong.
I see this often in students who are beginning their journey through hypnotherapy training, where the desire to get everything right can quietly override presence and connection.
They want to say the perfect words. Follow the script precisely. Deliver the induction exactly as taught. They worry about whether they’re doing it “properly”, rather than staying present with the person in front of them.
And in that moment, something important can be lost.
Because hypnotherapy isn’t about performing perfectly.
It’s about connection, responsiveness, curiosity, and presence.
When we cling too tightly to competence, to rules, scripts, and “correct” ways of doing things, we can become cautious, tight, and self-conscious. We stop listening deeply. We stop trusting ourselves. We stop allowing something new to emerge.
Why presence matters more than perfection
Brilliance lives in responsiveness, not rigidity
Brilliance often shows up when we’re willing to:
- Try, even when we’re unsure
- Notice what actually happens, rather than what we expected
- Respond to the person, not the manual
- Learn from experience, not just theory
The most powerful therapeutic moments don’t come from ticking boxes. They come from noticing a subtle shift in breath. A change in tone. A moment of emotion. A client responding in their own unique way. And that can only happen when we’re willing to be present, not perfect.
Learning through experience, not performance
Learning by doing (and being)
Of course, foundations matter. Training matters. Understanding hypnosis, language, safety, and ethics matters deeply.
But confidence doesn’t come before experience.
It comes because of experience.
We learn by doing. By reflecting. By adapting. By trusting that we don’t need to be flawless to be effective — we need to be human.
When students allow themselves to relax into the process, something shifts. Their voice softens. Their intuition wakes up. Their sessions become more authentic, more embodied, more impactful.
That’s where brilliance quietly begins.
This approach is at the heart of how I teach, supporting students to grow confidence through experience rather than performance in my hypnotherapy courses.
An invitation
If you’ve been holding back because you’re worried about not being “good enough” yet, whether in hypnotherapy, personal growth, or life, perhaps this is your gentle nudge.
You don’t need to wait until you feel completely ready.
You don’t need to get it perfect.
You just need to begin.
And if you feel called to explore hypnotherapy in a supportive, encouraging environment, one that values learning, curiosity, and real human connection over rigid perfection, my next Foundation Level Hypnotherapy Training may be for you.
It’s a space where questions are welcomed, mistakes are part of the learning, and confidence grows naturally through experience.
Sometimes, letting go of the need to be competent is exactly what allows something brilliant to emerge.
Katina Chapman Hypnotherapy Training – Accredited online and in-person hypnotherapy and hypnosis training throughout the UK. Learn live and interactively from anywhere, or join me in Norwich.
Personal Hypnotherapy Sessions – Available in Lowestoft, Norwich, and online for anxiety, stress, depression, confidence, and more.